Even very simple things like “do what you can”, “say what you want to say” these are not as easy as they are mentioned here, many a times, it is difficult to actually know, ‘what we know’, and ‘how do we know what we do not know’, If say for example I say “I do not know” then, what I mean is, ‘I know’ that ‘I do not know’, then, how do I say, that I do not know? The interpretation is that I know the name of a concept which I do not know! But, interestingly, how do you express something you know? Again I will be able to say, what I do know, by using the same names. Even though all the above looks complicated, they are really simple, they get complicated, when we introduce another important intervention in the above, namely the EGO.

Now, when I say “it is raining outside” and if it so happens, that it is not raining, then, what I am saying is a lie, but, the person who is saying this, may not be a liar, as it may so happen that he may know, that he is lying, if he knows that he is lying, then he is actually a speaker of truth.

It will be a giant leap for the mankind, if one could cut the link between what is said, and who says it. If we could differentiate the person and what is said, then there will be a lot more clarity in what we speak and communicate. In our normal conversations, we get into this habit of fixing certain opinions on people, and this habit of forming opinions happens, because of our construction of the personality of a person in our mind, from what a person says or does. This habit of ‘judging’ causes immense stress both for the person and for the other.

All relationship among people is interesting because of the conflicts that we hold. These conflicts arise out of our assumption of the personality that we form of the others, type A of these conflicts are our inability to accept the value system of the others, what may look normal behaviour for person A could be blasphemous for person B and vice versa. Type B of these conflicts arise out of the intervention of the EGO, which is to tie the person with his behaviour or words, these forms judgements, which is indirectly because of our assumption of the intention of the others action. These conflicts are generally solved, if the clarity emerges out of the justification provided by bringing into light the intentions, but in most of the cases, these justifications are not accepted because of the mistrust created, which is assumed again to be an attempt to safeguard the ego, (ego here is defined as an attempt to protect oneself from forming opinions which is not acceptable by the other).

In many cases, the conflict is a double edged sword, the more you try to safeguard one the more risk you will take in loosing the other. Mostly it will be between, an issue and relationship. If one tries to safeguard the issue, then one runs the risk of ruining the relationship and vice versa.